SIGNAL STATUS: REALITY FREQUENCY BREACH DETECTED
Dear Interdimensional Travelers,
Oliver here with what I can only describe as the most extraordinary—and frankly reality-altering—broadcast we've ever transmitted. What began as a routine interview about a miraculous Raid survival has become... well, I'm still processing it myself.
⚠️ CRITICAL BROADCAST NOTICE ⚠️
This episode has been classified as Level Seven: Interdimensional Awareness Required. During recording, an unexpected linguistic incident triggered a cascade of revelations that fundamentally altered the nature of our broadcast. I've been informed we're now transmitting to significantly more receivers than previously documented.
By "significantly more," I mean... actually, best not to think about the numbers. Trust me on that.
This Week's Transmission
In this 18-minute extended episode from "The Other Side of the Raid," what starts as correspondent Felicity Westfield's careful interview with Aria Evergreen about her impossible three-day solo Raid survival transforms into something else entirely when a simple cup of tea changes everything.
You'll discover:
🎙️ Why Aria spent twenty minutes desperately avoiding certain topics
📡 How one burned tongue revealed 242 years of hidden truth
✨ What happens when "narrative frequencies" aren't just a clever metaphor
🔮 The exact viewer count that made both Aria and your producer faint
☕ Why Felicity can finally stop suppressing her purring
Fair warning: This episode contains revelations about the true nature of BBN, discussions of Victorian Minotaurs with cravat collections, mentions of interdimensional cat networks, and mathematical figures that the human brain prefers not to process.
Technical Note from Oliver
I should mention that my "fictional frequency" equipment built in my garage is apparently... somewhat more functional than I realized. Also, I may need to lie down again after writing this. The number of you reading this right now is... no, not thinking about it. Moving on.
About This Recording
This episode represents a fundamental shift in BBN's broadcast parameters. What you're about to hear was originally intended for Earth-only transmission but automatically redirected to GMF-exclusive channels when certain... revelations occurred.
Felicity's 43-year cover is blown. My understanding of reality is thoroughly shattered. And Aria discovers she's famous in seventeen galaxies for hanging upside down from a Minotaur's armor.
It's been quite a day.
Content Advisory
Contains alien dialect exchanges (X'lothian, specifically)
Features discussion of pan-galactic gin
Includes fainting due to incomprehensible viewer statistics
May cause existential questions about seagulls
Tea temperature complaints lead to dimensional revelations
Listen Now
Press play to experience the moment when BBN's carefully maintained fiction collided with a rather more extensive reality. Just... perhaps have a seat first. And avoid doing math about the viewership numbers.
The blooper segment is included, wherein both interview participants become unconscious while Felicity makes tea and addresses quintillions of viewers with remarkable British calm.
Transmitting across more galaxies than I knew existed,
Oliver
Lead Producer, BBN
(Currently questioning everything)
P.S. - Apparently "Reality Show" is more literal than I imagined. Also, the seagulls might actually be... no, surely she was joking about that. Surely.
Note: BBN utilizes advanced AI narrative technology to facilitate clear communication across dimensional barriers. This technology is apparently far more advanced than its creator realized. Also, hello to our viewers in the Andromeda Sector—all 1.7 trillion of you.
Post-Episode Resources
🌟 For Our GMF Audience: Thank you for your patience while we sorted out Oliver's technical awakening
📻 For New Earth Listeners: Welcome to a larger universe than you expected
🎭 For Trevor the Minotaur: Felicity will forward your cravat care tips to Aria as requested
This has been a Classification Seven broadcast. Please adjust your reality parameters accordingly.
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